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December 13, 2012
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RAIN p279 - Flashbacks by JocelynSamara RAIN p279 - Flashbacks by JocelynSamara
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I apologize, but I’m going to go into preachy PSA mode: Speaking as a transsexual, I honestly believe that if you are trans and plan on having a relationship with a cisgendered person (or anyone, really), then it is imperative that your partner know of your transgenderism. This is not a topic to be taken lightly. If you don’t feel like you can tell your partner your deepest secrets - and especially if you don't feel SAFE telling your partner - you might want to consider rethinking things a little.

I understand why transfolk try to hide it. I really do. But I don’t think it’s right, personally. I actually don’t think it’s fair to the cis person (whether they’d be accepting or not), and it’s potentially very dangerous for the transperson. And further speaking as a transwoman happily married to a ciswoman for over four years (and together over seven), I can vouch that having the freedom to talk about the subject at any time with her, has been an incredibly relevant aspect of our relationship. I don’t think we would’ve lasted if I had to keep telling lies and keeping secrets and internalizing all my problems to hide my being trans from her.

[/PSA Mode]

And seriously, sorry for that. I’ve heard too many real life stories of relationships between trans and cis ending really badly for exactly THIS reason to not want to bring it to light.

Anyway, big moment of clarification, as we see into Aiken’s head a little. In your opinion, is the guy completely irredeemable, or might there be hope for the guy yet?

Whew… mouthful today. ^^;

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:icontreager-sama:
treager-sama Feb 24, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Whew, heavy stuff today... I had a feeling that Aiken had a bad experience along these lines, which is why he wouldn't talk about it. I want him to accept Rain so badly, but now I can see her instincts on how he would react, were accurate and justified. C'mon Aiken, be the good guy we all want you to be!
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:iconreinahw:
ReinaHW Oct 10, 2013   Writer
I've purposely avoided relationships due to my being trans*, I'm already under a lot of stress and being in a relationship with someone would only make things worse.  I get hit on way too often though, very tiresome.
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:iconfairportfan:
Really serious relationships demand honesty.
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:iconabidrew:
I KNEW IT! I KNEW IT I KNEW IT!

I dimly suspected something from the commercial itself, actually, and then the phone call my mind was like "and now she's told him".  And I was right!

As for Aiken...  Well...  That's kinda hard to say right now.  Is he a total jerk and a bit of a bigot?  Yes.  Are all jerks and bigots necessarily permanent jerks and bigots?  No.  They actually can be cured.  They just have to want it for themselves.
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:icondaotianzi:
HOLY CRAP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

In response to ~dolphine64575, when it comes to most straight cisgender men, they don't exactly get it. I've talked to my cousins about sex, gender, orientation, & attraction, & they just stare at me like wtf! I wish otherwise, but you can't just expect people to be accepting. You can expect them to react rationally, which may seem irrational when what they're reacting to seems paradigm shifting to them, but perfectly normal to you.

Also, even though Aiken did technically "leave" Jessie, he still plans on marrying her despite her coming out to him. He may not be a complete bigot, he could just be facing some conflict between how he's seen the world 'till now & what he's seen in the world recently.

In response to ~lebt, I agree.
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:icondolphin64575:
dolphin64575 Dec 31, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
...I don't like Aiken. How can he just walk away from the woman he proposed to?
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:iconlebt:
lebt Jan 12, 2013   General Artist
I understand this sentiment... but on the opposite side of the same token... how could she not have told him sooner? Huge piece of dishonesty, whether she is post or pre op. Just my .02.
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:icondolphin64575:
dolphin64575 Jan 13, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Yeah, true...
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