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RAIN p136 - Not a Word by JocelynSamara RAIN p136 - Not a Word by JocelynSamara
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The night just got awkward and they're not even AT the party yet... hoo boy...

A friendly word of advice to any cisgendered people who have transgendered friends: if you ever - for whatever reason - plan on crossdressing publicly with them around, please make sure you clear it with them beforehand. That might sound silly to you, but while some transsexuals might be totally fine with it, others may be deeply offended. Itís wise to just make sure you know where your friends stand.

©2004-2011
Rain, all characters and all other aspects of the story are copyright material belonging to me.
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:icon00001235:
00001235 Featured By Owner Jun 7, 2015
 yup i hate it when people crossdress for mocking people and once my gf asked me if i was a lesbian and if i want to go out with her well i said yes to both but thats not the point! When will people realize that they shouldn't mock other people because theyre different. Everyones Different. Unless your a clone of someone else
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:icondreamingxashley:
DreamingxAshley Featured By Owner Edited May 23, 2015  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
You know... people have been crossdressing for as long as there has been people. I get what you're saying but it's not always about you (I'm not trying to be mean) Assuming they are doing it out of mockery, especially if they are a close and caring friend, is awfully rude. I know some people will get offended no matter what, but we need to learn context and base our reactions on that.
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:iconinhumancreator:
InhumanCreator Featured By Owner Oct 21, 2014  Student General Artist
Rudy... you dumb.... nevermind... you should have thaught about Rain BEFORE picking that costume *facepalm*... btw sorry that I comment so much on this comic I just like to well... "speak"? to the characters haha :P
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:iconarbysmcdouble:
arbysmcdouble Featured By Owner Oct 7, 2014  Student General Artist
I know I feel uncomfortable when my friends do stuff like this just to make fun of it

hell sometimes people that i barely know do it just to make fun of me
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:iconcuriousviolet:
CuriousViolet Featured By Owner Aug 18, 2013
I think it's remarkably sensitive of Jocelyn to make this point, but it could be made plainer.  A MTF worried about passing spends every second comparing herself to others.  A friend crossdressing for fun or excitement or exotic thrill is likely to feel it is "joining" up with the MTF but the opposite is more the case - since it's easier to understand (from the outside) the motives of the crossdresser than the TS, the TS feels the significance of her presentation (a deeply profound expression of sense of self, serious business!) put on the same level, and worse yet, gets the impression that her friend doesn't understand her at all.  One of the instincts of a MTF is to keep their distance from others who crossdress for non-Gender identity reasons.  In fact if you are like me, you may want to keep some distance even from other TS's in early stages of attempting to pass in public - it can reawaken some painful memories, and it can make it easy for a long time TS to be read or suspected. (Myself = 24 years post-transition)
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:iconryu890:
Ryu890 Featured By Owner Aug 30, 2012
:) The key here, is to imagine things from the other's perspective. Does Rain REALLY think a supportive, if a tad weird, like Rudy would openly mock her?
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:iconlomablen:
Lomablen Featured By Owner Jun 5, 2012
I didn't really expect Rudy to be like that, but it goes well whit his attitude. xD
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:iconryu890:
Ryu890 Featured By Owner Mar 25, 2012
*shrugs* I have a strong dislike of arbitrarily limiting oneself. Just because I am transgendered, shouldn't limit other's 'right' to crossdress for other reasons, be it comedy or sexual pleasure.

On that note, I still pee standing up for the time being. In the end, it IS more convenient...for now anyways. I plan on going through the whole SRS process down the line...but thats really more for the sake of passing....

Pbbb....I HAVE complex thoughts on the matter....I'm just nervous about offending people. ^^; Not sure how to share my thoughts.
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:iconperilsofrosella:
PerilsOfRosella Featured By Owner Aug 8, 2012  Professional General Artist
I agree. I am not transgender, but I don't see how it's offensive to cross dress. I identify as female, and was born female, but enjoy occasionally crossdressing. What difference does it make? How is it hurting someone else?

This particular situation in the comic is a little more tender, as we are dealing with teenagers, but still... is Rudy not allowed to explore his own sexual identity?

In regards to your personal comment, I would do the same thing in your situation. :3
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:iconryu890:
Ryu890 Featured By Owner Mar 25, 2012
....

I acctually said that.

Seriously. I am NOT thinking clearly tonight. >_<
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:iconusagiknight:
UsagiKnight Featured By Owner Nov 13, 2011  Student Traditional Artist
Shame to say, it happened to me once. I was trick or treating once with a friend who brought a friend who brought a friend and that was the guy who crossdressed for Halloween. I can admit I was a little hurt, and since i didn't come out at that time no one really understood why I didn't want to speak. Ultimately it was my little sis who reassured me, saying he can never compare to me. That was really sweet to hear to be honest. But again, I'm not here to shoot down people's fun because I'm a little offended, I just have to reassure myself I guess. But as you pointed out, if its someone you personally know, you do want to have a little curtousy. But hopefully that never happened to you, but knowing you it must have happened in some way, hope you weren't too hurt?
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:iconreviveddragon:
RevivedDragon Featured By Owner Nov 6, 2011  Hobbyist General Artist
Ah, when a girl doesn't say a word, you know she's angry...
... weird, I don't say a word when I'm angry...
:iconpervplz:
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:iconneotruekaiser:
neotruekaiser Featured By Owner Oct 24, 2011
i think rain may be pissed because rudy did such a great job on a one time costume and rain works at it all the time..
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:iconivanprz:
ivanprz Featured By Owner Oct 23, 2011  Student Digital Artist
WTF??? so you have to get a permit or some kind of shit to disguise as a girl??
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:iconperilsofrosella:
PerilsOfRosella Featured By Owner Aug 8, 2012  Professional General Artist
This would have been fixed with "do you feel comfortable with me dressing as a girl for Halloween?" Even though, as I said in an earlier comment, Rudy may be exploring a facet of his sexuality, and Halloween is the safest day to do it.
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:icondolphin64575:
dolphin64575 Featured By Owner Nov 8, 2011  Hobbyist General Artist
Just that crossdressing as a joke could very well be seen as an insult to a transgendered person. Here, Rudy dressing up as a girl makes Rain think he's making fun of her/ belittling her.
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:icon14bj337:
14bj337 Featured By Owner Oct 22, 2011
What Rain wants to say in panel 6: "Maria, get the gun."

Seriously, though, this page provides the first comparison between public transgenderism (that's the best term I can think of to describe Rain's situation, sorry) and casual crossdressing. I imagine that part of the reason Rudy was chosen to crossdress on Halloween was to depict this relationship. Rain seems to be distraught and melancholy, if not outright offended, at seeing Rudy dressed as he is. She may feel that Rudy is parodying her lifestyle and making a mockery of what she is, be it unintentinally. Conversely, Rudy probably just thought this would be something fun to do. Maybe he's doing it to get a bit of Rain's own experience, or to pay a sort of silent homage to her. I think Rain feels troubled, but she doesn't want to let this little rift ruin her or her friends' night. Her failure to overreact shows that she is developing some emotional strength (especially considering her reaction to Rudy's accidentally-offensive comments earlier in chapter 5). Rudy, on the other hand, looks disappointed at Rain's reaction, and also guilty. Maybe he thought that Rain would be cool with it, maybe even be excited and supportive about what he's doing; seeing Rain so distraught probably crushed his hopes and made him feel like a jerk (you're not a jerk, Rudy! That's what Gavin's there for! Nah, just teasing.).

Aside from the silent exchange between Rain and Rudy (almost certainly the focal point of this page), the first two panels also feature talk between Rudy and Kylie. I think Kylie was kind of hoping that Rudy would answer in the affirmative, because then, he would have found someone just like him, and consequentially would be more willing to come out to the group. If only Kylie knew how close there lived one much like him... oh, irony. I like how Rudy almost slips up, but Gavin catches him. One of the cool things about a comic is the verbal-physical duality of the words that are printed: Gavin is speaking over Rudy, and Gavin's speech bubble is over Rudy's speech bubble. It really shows proficiency in this style, to be using something so simple, yet so clever.

Since it seems like everyone else has weighed in on the issue, I may as well give my two cents as well (although by the time I'm finished, I'll probably be mentally broke!). Personally, as a believer in the non-essentiality of the gender binary, I have no problem with people practicing behaviors or taking on attributes that are not expected of their socially-perceived gender. As such, I have no issue with those who choose to crossdress, be it on Halloween, a spirit day, or any day of the year. If you have fun doing something (as long as you aren't hurting yourself or anybody else), then you shouldn't let arbitrarily-decided social norms get it your way. Having said that, I do acknowledge a difference between "having fun" (enjoying one's self) and "making fun" (enjoying one's self at the expense of another). If Rudy is not careful (is that even an "if" statement?), he could be perceived as making fun of girls, tg girls (Rain) in particular. Still, as long as he doesn't try to make himself out to be a stereotype, I don't think he's doing anything wrong. Now, having said THAT (bear with me here), I don't think that Rain's response is "wrong". I say this purely because people often can't control how they feel. If Rain feels offended by Rudy's choice of costume, then she shouldn't feign support. Then again, she probably shouldn't immediately demand that Rudy change his costume, either, as that would be insensitive to his decision. I think there is a large gap between fully suppressing your emotions and fully expressing them, and I don't believe either extreme is desirable. I think the most important thing is that you recognize how you feel, but that you control your feelings (and that they don't control you!).

Whew... that really took it out of me. Another awesome page... excited for Halloween party... more drama... I think I'm gonna go to bed.
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:iconwhitefox00:
whitefox00 Featured By Owner Oct 22, 2011  Hobbyist Writer
This is kind of funny: a few hours after I read this comic (at school) I went to a student council meeting, where we were talking about school spirit week. Someone brought up 'trans day', where everyone cross-dresses for a day, and I was pretty surprised by how excited everyone was about it. At first, I had this little flick of annoyance (it was almost kind of hurtful), but then I actually thought about it, and it didn't seem like that big of a deal.
As we were leaving, though, these two girls were talking to one another about it, and one of them said "We might not get to do it because last year they said we couldn't because it 'may offend the gay community' or something like that." I had to laugh to myself about that; neither of them know that I'm trans, and that if it was going to offend anyone in the school, it would be me. xD
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:icondark7hero:
Dark7Hero Featured By Owner Oct 22, 2011
Ooooh i barelly know where to start here =D
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:iconboichick:
BoiChick Featured By Owner Oct 22, 2011
I'd actually be okay with a friend of mine crossdressing for Halloween if they weren't mocking me and/or if I could crosdress too.

Next year, my friend and I are both crossdressing as humanized ponies from Friendship is Magic. XD I'm FTM, so I figure I'll have a few difficulties (he won't let me bro-ify the pony, so I essentially have to FtMtF myself). But it's all in good fun -- moreso because we actually love the show and it's not really a drag fest. (Except maybe for me. I'm a drag queen myself. XD)
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:iconmajorkerina:
majorkerina Featured By Owner Oct 22, 2011  Student Writer
Awwww
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:iconon2xsecretprobation:
On2XSecretProbation Featured By Owner Oct 21, 2011  Hobbyist Writer
I can understand Rain's feelings about Rudy's costume. Not from a personal stand point mind you. But I can understand that she feels like Rudy is making light of her personal journey. I can also understand Rudy not wanting to hurt her with his costume but honor her. His situation of unintentionally hurting friends is one I'm unfortunatly quite familiar with...on both ends of that spectrum (that is being the one who has hurt and the one who was hurt).

I do hope someone spells out for him what he is doing wrong and that he apologizes to Rain.
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:iconstorytypist:
StoryTypist Featured By Owner Oct 21, 2011
For some reason, I am very confused as to what is going on here. .-.
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:iconsanguinerose92:
SanguineRose92 Featured By Owner Oct 21, 2011  Hobbyist Photographer
I'm a pre-everything trans girl. And this reminds me when a friend of mine told me to dress up as a girl for Halloween. She had good intentions because I could dress the way I want to without anyone else caring that day and while it IS a good idea, it actually offended and hurt me pretty bad because seeing as cis males who dress up as girls for fun, I wouldn't actually do it for fun and all in all, while it's pretty hard to explain how I feel about it, in my eyes I would personally be mocking my very self. Having to be in a "costume" of something that I actually am on the inside and strive to be all my life, I'd feel like I'm making fun of myself... It's hard to explain my feelings, sorry... :S

Although considering all things, I think I should try to pull it off, because I've yet to try being in full girl mode anywhere, and such events are great opportunities to see how I do...

In any case, interesting progress in the comic. Can't wait to see more. :)
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:iconwhitefox00:
whitefox00 Featured By Owner Oct 22, 2011  Hobbyist Writer
That happened to me a few years ago! This girl from my school who sort of knew that I was trans, but didn't understand it, told me that I should go 'as a girl' for Halloween. I totally understand where you're coming from.

And if may interject something here, I think that's a great idea to try 'girl mode' out in public, with a lot of people. Bring a friend for support, and see how you like it. The first five or ten times I did that (mainly at the mall and downtown), I was really, really, really nervous, but it was really exciting (and affirming). When no one looked at me weird or said anything, and when they used the right pronouns, that's when I knew 100% that that's what I wanted.

So in short, I think it's a really helpful tool. Even if you're nervous, I think you'll know if it's really for you. :)
Good luck on your journey. ^ ^
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:iconjocelynsamara:
JocelynSamara Featured By Owner Oct 21, 2011  Professional Writer
I see what you're saying. Although interestingly enough, I used Halloween as a means of coming out to my friends without really coming out to them about six years ago. I dressed as a girl for a Halloween party to gauge reactions and test the waters (and ultimately proved to be really helpful in the long run). When I did come out to them in the following weeks, most thought back to Halloween and it made explaining the situation a LOT easier. In fact, many told me they figured it out that night because I looked so authentic; I couldn't possibly just be joking around. Truthfully, I recommend this as a means of coming out if you're not out.

If you're uncomfortable about the idea fearing you might be mocking yourself, then don't simply wear a "girl" costume. Try a simple, but feminine costume. Like a witch or something. If you're not ready to come completely clean, just tell people you wanted to try something different and decided to go all out.
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:iconsanguinerose92:
SanguineRose92 Featured By Owner Oct 22, 2011  Hobbyist Photographer
Yeah, well, I don't need to use it to come out because I, in fact, am out. My family knows, my relatives do, as do my friends and a couple of other people. And everyone's accepting, more or less. I'm also visiting a therapist and should start therapy in a year if all goes well. I'm just being kept in "standby mode" for now. So coming out is not a problem. But yeah, I know what you're talking about, if I'd do that I'd be very authentic as well meaning I wouldn't joke around. Heck, people mistake me for a girl all the time even in boy mode. :D

Ah well, I'll see. Thanks for your opinion. ^^
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:iconidragoon:
iDragoon Featured By Owner Oct 21, 2011
Great work as usual :)
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:iconchitttick1:
chitttick1 Featured By Owner Oct 21, 2011
Umm...... I don't have any trans friends but, is it bad that most Halloweens I've dressed as a guy character or costume or whatever? I mean I've always been a tomboy too, so I just prefer some of the awesomer guy costumes, to the girly ones. Like last year I was Kickass for the movie "Kickass"...
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:iconjocelynsamara:
JocelynSamara Featured By Owner Oct 21, 2011  Professional Writer
There is a lot of gray area that still forces one to have to look at in on a case by case basis. I see what you're saying. You like dressing as characters you like regardless of their sex. To me; that's fine. It's more about who the character is to you than "what" the character is. At least, I hope I'm interpreting that correctly?

But then there are people who dress as the opposite sex just for attention. "It's all in good fun", they'll say as they make a huge scene and draw attention to how funny it is that they're dressed like that.

The difference is that you're doing it to show appreciation for characters you like, not simply to be make a scene. So, I don't think you need to be worried about what you're doing. It's quite innocent and sounds fairly harmless to me.
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:iconchitttick1:
chitttick1 Featured By Owner Oct 21, 2011
Oh okay, thanks for clarifying. :thanks:
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:iconxxkimmy32xx:
xXkimmy32Xx Featured By Owner Oct 21, 2011  Hobbyist Photographer
know the feeling rain =/
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:iconjimmiebrimstone:
JimmieBrimstone Featured By Owner Oct 21, 2011
I'm actually going to take "Ruby's" side on this one. I truely can see Lynn's point about how this will indanger Rian's secret and how the whole "dude in a dress" joke is completely hurtful. However, Rain really has no right to be offended by this. I'm not the writer so I can't pretend to know what is really going on the charcter's head but from the dialogue it apears that it's just an honest and straight forward desire to dress up as a female for halloween.

Rain's attitude is like a lot of transpeople who think that only a sellect few people should be allowed to express gender varience. That if your not a true blue take it all the way transsexual you have no right to dress as the oposite sex and that just close minded.
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:iconritsu-x-mio:
ritsu-x-mio Featured By Owner Oct 21, 2011
Actually, I see it a tad differently- I think that Rain believes that... uhm Ruby's... choice in costume cheapens/disregards what she happens to be going through, and that somehow... Ruby... is de-legitimatizing it or making fun of it.

Look at what happened when they first met... Ruby... was the first to, 'Hey, look what I saw!' — Rain could VERY WELL take it in a similar manner, seeing as it's happened BEFORE. Rain has -every- right to be upset, and I would be too were I were in Rain's EXACT situation. It isn't funny to do that sort of thing around someone you KNOW is struggling to fit in.

Although, it IS funny to see... Ruby... drawn with a pair of boobs. :XD:
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:iconjimmiebrimstone:
JimmieBrimstone Featured By Owner Oct 24, 2011
Rudy is a twit. I'll admit to that and up til this page, I never really cared for the character... and, well, probably still don't. I don't think what he's doing is the classiest thing to do but whether it is mockery or not will depend on his actions as "Ruby" not meerly by dressing as her.
If she carries on and makes a fool of herself to draw attention to the fact that she's a he, then I'd say Rain should be offended and kick his butt. (thoughts of fan art: Rain vs Ruby fight)
On the other hand if Ruby conducts herself like a good young lady should then I think that there's no problem with his costume. It could even be a possitive think esspecially for Kylie to see it's ok to dress up in public.
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:iconritsu-x-mio:
ritsu-x-mio Featured By Owner Oct 24, 2011
<two cents>Re-read what I said- I said that Rain BELIEVES that... Ruby... is making fun of her situation. However, If... Ruby... behaves and doesn't cause any sort of scene, I think that Rain might (although, begrudgingly) settle down.

I think her primary reaction was probably, "Oh my god! How COULD you do that without letting me know first? I probably wouldn't care as much or at least I could SAY something about it before-hand!"

Anyway, just my thoughts on the matter. (:
</two cents>
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:iconjimmiebrimstone:
JimmieBrimstone Featured By Owner Oct 25, 2011
I think we agree. Thank you for your comment
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:iconjocelynsamara:
JocelynSamara Featured By Owner Oct 21, 2011  Professional Writer
I won't address anything too directly, but it's worth mentioning that while she might be the main character, Rain isn't at all perfect (although some readers seem to think she is). There are going to be instances where she is right, but there will be some where she's VERY wrong too. It's the best part of having a teenage lead; she has all the room in the world to grow and learn.
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:iconjimmiebrimstone:
JimmieBrimstone Featured By Owner Oct 24, 2011
Fair enough and well said.
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:iconjimmiebrimstone:
JimmieBrimstone Featured By Owner Oct 21, 2011
p.s. the was a typo, stupid fingers, I didn't mean to call rain "rian" sorry
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:iconcoffinstufferd:
coffinstufferd Featured By Owner Oct 21, 2011
I can say from a transgendered perspective, I can't identify with how Rain feels. I guess maybe she feels like I feel, when people at work watch Jerry Springer? Because that's kind of entertainment at the expense of transpeople and its really hurtful. Idk, I don't think it would bother me much as long as I didn't think about it.
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:iconrandomguyc:
RandomGuyC Featured By Owner Oct 21, 2011
:iconyunoguy: RAIN, Y U SO OFFENDED OF OTHERS CROSSDRESSING!?
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:iconjocelynsamara:
JocelynSamara Featured By Owner Oct 21, 2011  Professional Writer
Some transfolk may view it as a mockery. It doesn't matter what their intentions really are (especially if the transperson in question is a little insecure, like Rain), it will come off like they're making fun. And of course, this IS Rudy we're talking about, so of course he's going to be acting a little over the top when they get to the party.

On top of which, the people at this party are his classmate; they know Rudy. He might pass, but he's still 100% recognizable to anyone who knows him. And there is a very interesting "phenomenon": It might be easy for one transperson to pass. But if there're two of them, it'll become more difficult to pass. And it progresses that way as more are added. The theory is that if an onlooker can read one person, they may go on to suspect other people around them. If there're enough transfolk gathered in one place, and onlooker may begin giving suspicious looks to even the cisgendered people.

To sum up, Rudy's doing this is dangerous to Rain's passability... and in her eyes, potentially mocking her.
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:iconrandomguyc:
RandomGuyC Featured By Owner Oct 21, 2011
:iconmotherofgod: That's deep.
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:icondolphin64575:
dolphin64575 Featured By Owner Oct 21, 2011  Hobbyist General Artist
Seriously, Rudy, just common knowledge that crossdressing for fun on Halloween with your trans friends around MIGHT POSSIBLY BE OFFENSIVE.
And If I were Maria and my brother tried that, I wouldn't even ask Rain, I'd just hit him over the head and make him change.
For some reason, Rain looks really detailed in panels 5 & 6.
How does Gavin know that Rain's mad if she doesn't talk about it? Did Ryan do that, too?
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:icon16bithero1995:
16bithero1995 Featured By Owner Oct 21, 2011
This reminds me of a time one of my friends who knows I'm trans made a trans joke to some1 who knows and it got really silent after that
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:iconmusicallover1234:
Musicallover1234 Featured By Owner Oct 21, 2011  Student Writer
Well Rudy almost spoiled Rain's secret. Maria seems way to happy to hurt her brother i think she just wanted Rain's permission. And Rain must really be pissed off, my guess is that she doesn't talk to him for a few hours.Well on to the party.
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:iconundertaker972:
Undertaker972 Featured By Owner Oct 21, 2011
wow, good thing i dont have any transgendered friends. they may not appreciate my little cd fetish
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:iconsamrules4:
samrules4 Featured By Owner Oct 21, 2011
and of course, ky's usual wtf face in panel 8
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