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While Kylie’s stance on gender still isn’t 100% clear to us, today’s update shows that he’s on a quite different page from Rain. Whereas Rain probably would’ve kept her secret forever if she could, Kylie sees sharing the secret as being a load off his mind; as he is, he feels like he’s lying to his new friends. He never realized he passes so well. And while he likes that he does, regrettably, he seems ashamed of it too.
But… no matter how conflicted he is, it’s bloody hard to come out to people! Especially when your four new friends are all such completely well-adjusted people without gender or sexuality issues… or so Kylie thinks. And so the lies(?) continue.
But is he really lying to his friends? Or is he just lying to himself? In fact, is he lying at all?
Rain, all characters and all other aspects of the story are copyright material belonging to me.
I feel like Ky isn't sure yet, perhaps leaning towards androgyny for now.
I was personally like Ky when it came to 'outing myself'. I knew that it was going to come up, so why not just shout it to the heavens and be done with it? It is a gradual process though, as I am not crass enough to gather everyone I know in a room and just blurt it out. I have done so individually at appropriate times.
Okay, its fascinating that Rain is on his mind even though Rain herself is more interested with just passing than looking for dates. But than again Ky probably doesn't understand how much of a life commitment it is considering that when living with Heather/Anti-Fara he only lives in a very cross-dresser type life style rather it be a 24/7 thing. This obviously just leaves him confused and doesn't know what to do. Hopefully this experience will help him figure out some feelings and if he really wants to see him self as a guy.
Really enjoy that the internal monologue that made him pick a costume with out looking. If you read Kashimashi chapter 3 and it is still a classic ackward moment for trans people.
It's not weird, it's an exploration!
Seriously, though, this page offers a window into Kylie's thoughts. If anything, Kylie's situation is even harder than Rain's, because he still has to grapple with his gender identity (whereas Rain has concluded hers). And the fact that he's attracted to Rain just makes things harder. Even though I said before that Kylie's probably terrified of being found out, I think he's even more afraid of NOT being found out. He's afraid that if he gets too deep into a friendship with any of them (especially Rain), that when the truth comes out, he'll be spurned. It'd be better to get rejected by new friends than by old ones. Still, admitting a secret is a very difficult thing to do. He dreads opening up. Like everything we dread, it just grows with time; yet in the moment, it's just so hard to overcome, that we give in to cowardice and ignorance, acting as if we won't need to face it, but knowing that we will. It's a Catch-22. Even though Heather may be villified for "outing" Kylie, she may in fact just be helping him, by telling others that which he is too embarrased, but needs, to say. Personally, I hope Kylie grows a pair (regrettably, pun intended) and comes clean to his new friends (and guarantee himself a position as the fifth (sixth?) main character!).
In the last panel, Maria seems to perform very much a non-role. What I mean, is, any of the four main characters could have said her line. I wonder how Kylie might have reacted differently, had the asker been Rain, or Rudy, or Gavin. Perhaps it simply reflects Maria's cheery and outgoing personality. More probably, though, it was just a case of one-of-them-has-to-do-it-so-the-story-can-go-on, and Maria drew the short straw.
Before I forget: this is a really good page. I love the pages that go in-depth with characters' thoughts and feelings, and this is the first such page since Chapter 5 began. I think I'm starting to like Kylie more and more. That's not to say that I didn't like him at first: rather, while at first, I would have been comfortable with him remaining a side character, I am now hoping that he becomes one of the main characters.
That's just my personal code of respect on the matter anyway. ^_^
and whatever is that costume I hope it's the right size if he doesn't want to reveal to much his identity
That's... probably kinda reaching though, isn't it...?