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December 28, 2010
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RAIN p.15 - It's a Small World by JocelynSamara RAIN p.15 - It's a Small World by JocelynSamara
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The title was supposed to be "It's a Small World After All". SmackJeeves and Comic Fury allow long page titles; so why not DA? :(

Gavin and Maria, once again so close to the truth, and yet so far. Rainís compelling response to Gavinís question (ie. - running the hell away) has helped to keep her secret safe for the time being, but was that really the best move?

I have to be honest. Iím not crazy about this page. Looking back, I think I couldíve probably condensed this page and the last page into one to make things move along a little quicker. But then Iíd have had less time to establish foreshadowing for Maria in the last page, and Rainís fear of discovery on this page. Okay, so maybe condensing isnít quite what Iím looking for, but I still feel like I could have done better with these two pages.

Rain, all characters and all other aspects of the story are copyright material belonging to me.
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eleventhdr Featured By Owner Dec 11, 2011  Hobbyist Artist
come on hehow hrd can ti be to figure out that this boy is becoming a girl!
NoyTelinu Featured By Owner Aug 20, 2012
Even things that can be obvious (this isn't) can be hard to figure out.

Not to mention that finding people with the same last names can happen easily. Especially if your family is huge...
JocelynSamara Featured By Owner Dec 11, 2011  Professional Writer
That would be incorrect. A transgirl is still a girl. She is not a boy and never was; she is a girl (regardless of physical anatomy). And she is not becoming anything; she is expressing herself outwardly how she feels inside.
seeker-of-revelation Featured By Owner Dec 30, 2010  Hobbyist Photographer
It's time for Amazing True Facts!

Did you know that the ride in Disneyland is simply named it's a small world? It's amazing, but true! The words "after all," while contained in the lyrics of the popular song, are not actually in the song title or the eponymous ride's name! Therefore, the title of this comic on deviantART is accidentally more faithful to Disney's canon than the ones on SmackJeeves and Comic Fury!

Tune in next time, and you might just learn some more Amazing True Facts!
JocelynSamara Featured By Owner Dec 30, 2010  Professional Writer
I... really didn't know that. :O_o: Well, now I don't feel quite so bad.

So... I wonder if I should be damning the other sites now for allowing too MANY letters... ^^;
UsagiKnight Featured By Owner Dec 30, 2010  Student Traditional Artist
Its your first webcomic, so it can be forgiven that you felt weird about these last pages. I think you need to just keep going and hope you evolve. That will always be best. Its the same advice you gave with Tower Artist, that no matter how it was written its where I am right now as a creator. This pacing, is where you are too. It may not be the best, but it isn't horrible, making it a great foundation to build on.

Now to the page, love how everything just exploded the moment Ryan was mentioned. Though you could read it fast, it feels natural to have a slight suspended time. The same way you feel when something new and foreboding comes to play. Though I also love that like real life Maria and Gavin still haven't thought to beyond their bet.

This is also a good time to bring this up. Me and my sis talked about how easy it is to read comics. I disagreed saying you can't just read the words and look at the pictures. Its the same as skimming the words in a book. For some reason its like watering down the emotion in the pictures. Sometimes on a 19 pg. ch. I take 30 minutes. I guess to feel every sound, breath, and sensation. It really is amazing how comics can be so much more than a bunch of pictures. I guess that is one of the many reasons I get so much out of Rain and hope it helps you find your rhythm. Trust me, you are doing awesome and really do inspire me with every new page. So trust me when I say that trying out new things is important to this point of your life and Rain's too.

Really sorry about the title :hug: creatively its an injustice. At least they let you post it rather than keeping it off because of too many panels
JocelynSamara Featured By Owner Dec 30, 2010  Professional Writer
Good point. Leave it to me to offer valuable advice and forget to follow it myself. ^^;

Now that mention it, it might not have been a bad idea if I had an extra panel depicting a moment of awkward silence to accentuate that "suspended time". Oh, well. 20/20 hindsight, and all that. I'm not changing anything on this page or any that's already been posted, but it's good to keep these things in mind.

I don't remember where it was, but I read once that "Manga is actually meant to be read quickly the first time. Soak in the story the first time, then read it again to get all of the finer details." I always thought that was an odd explanation though. I mean, I don't think it's wrong; but I don't think your preferred method is wrong either. Honestly, I think I've used both methods (and perhaps even your sister's too). I guess it depends on the comic or manga in particular that I'm reading.

Yeah, I'd be pretty mad if they limited how many panels I could use...
UsagiKnight Featured By Owner Jan 1, 2011  Student Traditional Artist
Well, manga is always a test of what we can do. So can only hope to do better next time. And the way we all experience manga is what makes every piece memorable in so many ways.

Love to see how it works, 'you cannot have more than 4 panels' 'why' 'because we rule all that's why' 'stupid internets'. All in that sci-fi, female, brittish, computer voice to for accuracy.
dolphin64575 Featured By Owner Dec 30, 2010  Hobbyist General Artist
ehehehehe... poor sweetheart! of course, she could always say she suddenly had to use the bathroom... love Maria's reaction!
JocelynSamara Featured By Owner Dec 30, 2010  Professional Writer
That would probably be the most tactful way out of this. ^_^

Heh. Maria, ever the opportunist!
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